Updated Division III Bracket (11/20)

Fisher defeated Union College yesterday setting up a rematch with Springfield College next weekend. Click on the bracket to see a bigger view of the bracket.

This is my final answer, Regis

Congrats, Houston Dynamo on your MLS Cup win. For those of you who don’t pay attention to American soccer, Houston took home the prize at the eleventh Major League Soccer championship, defeating the New England Revolution.

What? You don’t follow MLS? Oh. That’s okay, I guess.

How about that Chicago Rush, huh? For awhile there, I thought the Predators were going to come back in the fourth quarter. A score of 69-61 is kind of close for a championship game. But hey, Matt D’Orazio really bounced back from being the former quarterback of the Rochester Brigade to lead the Rush to capture the ArenaBowl XX.

No? No ArenaBowl? Arena football is just like regular football but indoors. C’mon. No? Well, what else is there?

Hey, that was quite a season for the Rochester Razorsharks? What’s a razorshark? Not really sure, but they play a pretty basketball game. Only four losses last season paired with a dominant post season game brought a championship home to the Flour City. Not bad, not bad at all.

Really? What do you mean you haven’t TiVo’d the ABA games? It’s just like regular basketball but without the weird new ball.

Okay, so most people probably don’t pay any attention to these leagues. American soccer, indoor football, and minor league basketball don’t really register on the sports-o-meter of the American public but for a sports junky, these are further layer of sports to learn and bring up in conversation.

Is it sad that I can tell you that before playing in Milwaukee, the Brewers were once the Seattle Pilots? Is it pathetic that I know that the Kings made a cross country trip, going from Rochester and Cincinnati (as the Royals) and then becoming the Kings in Kansas City before finally reaching Sacramento? How about the fact that I know that the Tampa Bay Storm (AFL here, people, AFL) were once the Pittsburgh Gladiators?

I know that I’m not the only like this out there. There has to be numerous people lurking in the shadows who know that the Rochester Jeffersons got kicked around in the early days of the NFL and that the New York Yankees started the twentieth century off as the Baltimore Orioles.

Seriously here, folks, this is the life of someone who has nothing better to do than study the logos of the New York Islanders – 1996 fisherman, anyone? – and knows that MLS once had a central division.

Maybe sports facts were created just for the sole purpose of allowing me to win Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? one day. I’m pretty sure that’s not why we have math. Um . . . the circumference is 8.2, Regis? I don’t think so. Sports, like history, is a field full of random facts and knowledge, all ripe for the picking of those who don’t see the need in memorizing the formula to find how two triangles are congruent. That’s what my calculator is for.

I can tell you the name of every president back to Herbert Hoover and in which year they took office and I can tell you every World Series champion to before I was born. For the life of me though, I couldn’t explain to you how to factor trinomials. Honestly, I don’t even remember what a trinomial is anymore.

It’s kind of like natural selection, a survival of the fittest for the mind. I can remember history since it plays a part in everyday life and I can remember sports since it gives me something to talk about at Thanksgiving and makes my extended family like me.

One day, Millionaire will call. And on that, I will be ready. Former Mets’ manager Bobby Valentine coaches the Chiba Lotte Marines. Final answer, Regis, final answer.

- Originally published in the Cardinal Courier (Volume 6-Issue 5; November 15, 2006)

Athletics keystone of St. John Fisher College

I was thinking about writing another edition of weird sports that we should add to the Fisher athletics program. Last year, I made the proposal to create cricket, elephant polo, and Russian roulette teams . . . and no one ever got back to me on it.

Oh well.

I thought they would be exciting at least.

This got me to thinking though, what would happen had no one responded to the initial requests of basic sports at Fisher? You know, the first time a really tall kid brought up the idea of creating a basketball team? Or, the first time a kid who could throw a ball really far brought up the idea of creating a football team?

Actually to answer that last question, just see Nazareth. Or RIT. Go Tigers football! It’s grrrr-eat!

Anyways, just try to imagine this campus without any sports teams. What would Fisher be like without the athletic aesthetic?

Well, alumni and family weekends would be kind of strange without the football team to watch. What would the slew of visitors do in lieu of this activity? Hmmm . . . well . . . Fisher doesn’t have much going on on-campus does it? I guess everyone could hang out in the campus center . . . and . . . well . . . yeah, there’s not much there either. I guess alumni and family weekends would be just a little bit pathetic without the football team, huh? I pretty sure my family wouldn’t want to hang out in the campus center and watch COP work through the windows. Boring.

How about that rivalry with Nazareth College? Could we still hold onto that without athletics? Maybe we could start up a math league or something. Does anyone know if mathletes fight each other? I’d hate to be the security officer assigned to the multiplication matches.

“Daddy, what do you do for your job?” little Bobby would ask his father.

“Well son, your father works security at the Math Olympics,” the father would say. “It’s my job to make sure the fans don’t get into fights. You know son, there’s a lot excitement at those math matches – without me there, who knows, fans might get out of control and start throwing abacuses or something.

Little Bobby would look up at his father now. “Daddy? Am I adopted?”

Okay, so the idea of taking athletics out of the Fisher-Nazareth, ahem, equation would leave us with little to fight about. I mean, there really isn’t much to fight about when everyone already knows that Fisher is the superior institution.

So without athletics here at Fisher, we’ve so far checked off any excitement on alumni and family weekends and kicked the Fisher-Naz rivalry to the curb. What else could we examine?

How about the use of the space that the athletics facility now takes up? Imagine if the strip of land between the old Fishbowl up to I-490 was empty. Short of building a landing strip – Fisher International Airport anyone? – what could we use that area for?

Well, what could Fisher use? What are we missing? And you can’t say a pool or ice rink since that defies the purpose of this exercise. Hmmm . . .

I know. This is the answer to the biggest problem on this campus right now – besides the ladybugs that have invades my room, that is – a parking garage. We could use that space to put up a massive, leviathan of parking garage.

Only one problem. Without athletics on campus, without teams and players to rally around, we wouldn’t need to house all those cars. Why? No one would stick around if we didn’t have the athletics that we do.

Yeah, Fisher might not be perfect when it comes to athletics. Some of our facilities might be a little outdated or over-packed. We have teams that lose. We don’t have a pool or a track or an ice rink. But we’re doing pretty well.

Now how about that elephant polo team?

- Originally published in the Cardinal Courier (Volume 6-Issue 4; November 1, 2006)

The A-Rod Disaster

Sometimes in a relationship, things start to go sour, the magic seems to be gone and it might just be time to move on.

Well, I guess it would be time for Alex Rodriguez to gather up his CDs and leave New York. This relationship has more than run its course and is becoming unhealthy.

In the most recent post-season collapse of the Yankees, A-Rod had one hit. One lousy hit. This from the 2005 AL MVP, the man who many say could be the greatest player of his generation. One hit.

It’s now more obvious than it ever was (and it was pretty obvious after last season’s A-Rod break down) that Rodriguez can’t hack it in the Big Apple. Yeah, he’ll post a pretty batting average and hit home runs but most of them aren’t clutch. Alex Rodriguez and clutch go together as well as Kevin Federline and Mensa.

The concept of being a Yankee is one that Rodriguez still fails to grasp. It’s not about personal stats and awards – only the end result matters in the Bronx. Win or World Series or else it was all for notion. And so far, A-Rod has been all for nothing.

Maybe the deck is stacked against A-Rod. Derek Jeter, the captain, has been there his entire career and is the cornerstone of the Yankees. Or the keystone – whichever one makes more sense. Needless to say, you don’t go against Jeter. And most Yankees know that. Even Steinbrenner knows that. Despite being friends almost a decade ago, things changed between Rodriguez and Jeter and by the time the former Texas Ranger arrived, things were pretty cool between the two. A-Rod even had to surrender his lifelong spot at shortstop to Jeter just to be a Yankee.

Manager Joe Torre, another key to the success of the Yankees over the past ten years, doesn’t seem to be a big fan of A-Rod either. During the series against Detroit, he batted the future Hall of Famer in the lower positions of the line-up. Now that everyone knows that Torre will return for another season at the helm of the Yankees, it appears that Rodriguez lost this battle.

The Yankees have to move him. Unfortunately, the very fact that they are the Yankees will hurt the chances of getting fair trade value from other teams. No one is going to willingly help the Yanks solve their biggest problem. In a perfect world, the Yankees would get young pitching in return for a player still in his prime. Probably not going to happen. It doesn’t matter though. Almost any price will be worth it just to fix the chemistry problem that has brought the New York Yankees post-season success rate down to the level of the Atlanta Braves.

The Yanks won championships in 1996, 1998, 1999 and 2000, with a collection of players who understood what mattered. The Scott Brosiuses, the Tino Martinezes – they knew what it meant to be a Yankee. I would take them any day over Alex Rodriguez.

A-Rod, your time is New York is over. Your welcome is worn out. Pack your bags, gather up your sunbathing lotion, and box up your collection of whine – it’s time to go.

- Originally published in the Cardinal Courier (Volume 6-Issue 3; October 18, 2006)

The State of Journalism vs. Barry Bonds

The legal proceedings surrounding Barry Bonds, his alleged use of steroids and the participation by BALCO in our nation’s realm of sports has sent a few men to prison. Unfortunately, not a single one of them is Bonds.

One of the men behind bars is Greg Anderson, Bonds’ trainer who, according to several sources, supplied the slugger with illegal steroids. Anderson went to jail after refusing to testify whether or not Bonds committed perjury in a previous federal grand jury. Anyone with any bit of sense can understand what occurred here. Had Anderson been able to state under oath that Bonds had not committed perjury, Anderson would have had no reason to not testify. The very fact that he refused to further paints Bonds as guilty in the eyes of the public.

The two recent victims of the Bonds storm are Lance Williams and Mark Fainaru-Wada. Why are these two men going to prison? Did they work for the BALCO labs that created the steroids? Did they give the drugs to Bonds and his other cohorts? Did they refuse to implicate the cheaters in our legal system?

No.

They wrote a book exposing Bonds, Anderson, BALCO and a laundry list of other American athletes in terms of steroid use. Game of Shadows was released earlier this year and was based partly on the transcripts of the grand jury that investigated BALCO. These transcripts were leaked and the authors have refused to reveal to the courts the source of the leak. A judge has found the two to be in contempt and sentenced them to a maximum of 18 months in prison.

Let’s take a closer look at what’s happened here. The first joke of a hearing gave any baseball player that testified immunity from being charged with steroid use. Mark McGwire refused to talk about his possible steroid past, Sammy Sosa somehow conveniently forgot how to speak English, and Rafael Palmeiro waved his finger at those insinuating that he had ever touched steroids. A year later now, both Sosa and Palmeiro are out of the game with Palmeiro actually failing a steroid test.

None of these men went to jail. But two journalists, after researching and digging for the truth, are. Something is definitely wrong here. Disgustingly wrong.

I lay the blame for what has happened with several parties.

Baseball, instead of turning a blind eye to the steroid use devouring the game from inside and riding the wave of popularity that came with it, should have rooted out the cheaters and expelled them from the game. Not a suspension, not a slap on the wrist. Expulsion. Bud Selig, the commissioner, should have ordered every player tested. There is no infringement of rights here – why should athletes be excluded from the drug testing that goes on in any other job out there?

Sports, the commissioners of the leagues, the fans, the clean athletes being tainted by their cheating brothers – they all should’ve demanded action.

But unfortunately, that never happened. Steroids were allowed to have their way with the players, with the game. They chewed up and spat out careers, warped the record books, and forced the fans to look suspiciously on every accomplishment and every athlete.

Fans shouldn’t have to be the judge and jury on the steroid issue. There are real judges and juries to do that. Sadly though, they aren’t doing their jobs either. And that’s why two journalists who were just doing their jobs are now going to prison while Bonds and other cheaters continue to collect handsome paychecks.

I understand that the current system doesn’t allow for journalists to be afforded the right to withhold information from federal courts. But when the government isn’t doing its job, people Williams and Fainaru-Wada step in. That’s the beauty of a free press – it keeps everyone in check. In countries that have state-controlled newspapers, people will never receive truth or news that may offend those in power. There are those at every level who wish to censor the press since they don’t like what’s being said.

It’s a shame to see two honest, hard working men like Williams and Fainaru-Wada go to prison because of someone’s ego and arrogance.

- Originally published in the Cardinal Courier (Volume 6-Issue 2; October 4, 2006)

A Summer of Sports

How was everyone’s summer? Short? Yeah, I know the feeling. I clocked in an average of 60 hours a week at work. Between working at a CVS and working at a science warehouse – where I put bagged animals to the shelf – I didn’t have much free time. That doesn’t mean though, that I didn’t have time to take in the wide world of sports. Here’s a little timeline of my summer in sports.

April 29: Watched the NFL Draft. Being a Bills fan, I’ve grown to use to disappointment and failure. It’s a sad thing, but I’ve come to expect it. For a team that changes head coaches and quarterbacks more often than Hillary Clinton changes sides on an issue (save this one – you’ll all appreciate it come the 2008 presidential election), you really can’t expect much consistent success. But I’m used to that. So when the Bills came up with the eighth pick in the draft this year and Matt Leinart was still available, I should’ve just known that the Bills leadership would screw up. I mean, why would Buffalo want a two-time national champion, Heisman winning, box office draw? Naw . . . we don’t need those in Buffalo. Instead, the Bills took a safety who no one thought would even go in the top ten. Amazing. Just amazing.

May 28: Barry Bonds hits career home run 714. Baseball fans weep on this day. When talking about Bonds, I’m legally required to use the word “allegedly.” Bonds “allegedly” used steroids. Bonds “allegedly” cheated at the game of baseball. Bonds “allegedly” scarred the record books. Retire, Bonds. Do us all a favor and retire.

June 1: The Buffalo Sabres are eliminated from the NHL play-offs. Oh well, NHL, you almost got me to care. Really, you were really, really close. After a year of no hockey, the NHL returned with new rules and a new attitude – or at least that’s what the advertising campaign told me. But kudos to you, NHL, you’ve piqued my interest, whetted my appetite now. I think I might just tune in a little bit more this upcoming season. If not for the hockey, but to see the Sabres’ new jersey. Let’s go charging slugs!

June 3: Attended the opening of PAETEC Park. For those of you not from the Rochester area, PAETEC is our soccer stadium, home of the Rochester Rhinos. For those of you not from the Rochester area, the Rhinos are probably the greatest non-MLS soccer team in America. This stadium went through constant redesigns, relocations, and refinancing. So after years of hard work and determination, PAETEC Park finally opened its doors in June. And it poured. Not just your usual “Oh it’s Rochester, of course it’s raining” rain, but torrential downpour “let’s start building an ark in the Kodak parking lot” kind of rain. Due to my disposition to pneumonia, I left at the half.

July 16: Michelle Wie withdraws from the John Deere Classic due to “heat exhaustion."

September 8: Michelle Wie misses cut at the Omega European Masters.

September 15: Michelle Wie misses cut at the 84 Lumber Classic. Okay, for those of your catching onto a trend here, I’m not a fan of Michelle Wie. She worth millions in endorsement deals and Time magazine said that she’s one of the people who will shape our world, etcetera, etcetera. Well, I’m not buying it. So far, all we’ve seen from her is a girl with poor golf etiquette, someone who felt she didn’t have to pay her dues before going trying to go to the top of the sport, and someone who at this point, has made the cut at zero PGA events. For those keeping score at home, Michelle Wie and myself have made the cut at the same number of PGA events. And I don’t even have an endorsement deal.

Welcome back, everyone. Enjoy another season of Courier sports.

- Originally published in the Cardinal Courier (Volume 6-Issue 1; September 20, 2006)

Reggie, Matt, the Ducks, and nothing

First up - the NFL Draft. You gotta love the fact that ESPN devotes an entire weekend of coverage to a league's annual selection of players. No one cares about baseball's draft. It's a non-event. Can anyone tell me who the first pick of the 2001 MLB amateur draft was? Yeah, I can, but that doesn't count for this exercise. Now who can name the top pick in 2001 for the NFL? Michael Vick. Anyways, basically anything the NFL does now is a show. You could have the Barber twins in a mudwrestling event while Eli Manning sounds out Goodnight Moon and it would draw ratings. And I, like a lot of you out there, watched it to. Mainly to see who went in the top ten and especially since my Bills had the eighth pick. I'll get to that in a second.

The Texans passed on Reggie Bush. Really, for all their talk about wanting Mario Williams over Reggie, I just assumed like everyone else that Houston management was just talking in hopes of raising the stakes and forcing Bush's and his agent's hand to sign with them. I was pretty surprised to see in Saturday's paper that Williams had agreed to a contract with the Texans. I understand why the Texans passed on Vince Young. David Carr has had problems but he hasn't had much to work with up to this point. Which is where Reggie would've come in handy. A dynamic player would've changed that young franchise.

So because of the Texans' blow chance at an amazing talent, the Saints got lucky, something the city of New Orleans hasn't had much of lately. I've heard talk that Bush isn't going to sign with the Saints and he's going to hold out for money and blah, blah, blah. Whatever. That would be a PR nightmare. A disaster. I really hope that Reggie Bush doesn't want to be the one to turn against that city. I thought Eli Manning was a punk for determining where he went as a rook but anyone who snubs NO would be deemed a monster. So whoever it is out there helping Bush make decisions, make the right one here.

Now onto what killed me the most about this draft. Once again, the Buffalo Bills excelled in ineptitude. Eighth overall pick. You have to screw up pretty bad the year before in order to get that pick. And you have to screw up pretty bad to waste that pick. Welcome to life in Bills Nation.

Matt Leinart.

We could've had Matt Leinart. You know - Heisman winner Matt Leinart. National champion Matt Leinart. Box office draw Matt Leinart. I knew we wouldn't draft him. I didn't even think he'd be around when the eighth pick came up. But he was so I started hoping that maybe, just maybe Levy and gang would take Leinart. Yes, I know that we have JP Losman to play quarterback. But passing on Leinhart since you have Losman is like passing on Stacy Keibler since you have Teri Hatcher. Teri Hatcher was nice that one time she was on Seinfeld but she's really nothing to look at anymore. And don't correct me on that. I'm a dude. I think that I'll make that decision.

Could you Bills fans out there imagine Leinart playing in Orchard Park? I personally would bestow forgiveness upon all Bills coaches and executives for the past decade of blunders if we had Leinhart. I will put money on Leinhart being the next Roethlisberger. Like the rest of the Bills fans out there, I continue to take abuse year after year. Damn you, Bills - why can't I quit you?

Let's see - up next the two-headed play-off monster that is the NBA and NHL. Honestly, I don't really care all that much about either one. I will admit though, that I've slowly started caring about hockey. This could be due to the fact that the Sabres are in the thick of things right now and most of those kids played in Rochester for the Amerks last year. Maybe.

But I've also decided that I don't really have a favorite team in either league. Yeah, I'll root for the Sabes. I rooted for the Mighty Ducks when they played a couple years ago and I still feel a like for them to this day. Maybe it's because I use to watch the movies back in the day. I had a birthday party where we went to see D3 and I got a Ducks hat for my First Communion. When it comes to the NBA, I'll root for a couple teams. The Nuggets for Carmelo (go 'Cuse!), the Cavs for LeBron (go bandwagon!), or sometimes the Kings since they are the holders of Rochester's only championship from one of the big leagues - Rochester Royals, 1951 NBA champions.

I'll talk more about this stuff in later posts. These postseasons go on forever so I'll have about three months of material.

And finally, Michelle Wie. For those of you new to listening to me talk about sports, let me fill you in on a secret: I hate her. Yes, yes - journalistic objectivity, yadda yadda. I'll make an exception for her. I hate Michelle Wie. She'll be attempting to get into the men's US Open again this year and will probably fail at it again.

Who does this kid think she is? At this point, she's won nothing. She is nothing. Michelle Wie needs to go out and win some LPGA tournaments before she tries to play with the guys. Actually, she just needs to stop trying to play with the guys. The LPGA has rules against men playing in their tournaments but the PGA doesn't outlaw women. It should though. I could make some kind of metaphor about Wie being to the PGA as illegal immigrants are to American workers but I'll pass for now.

Basically, Michelle Wie and myself have the same track record when it comes to making PGA cuts: zero. And I suck at teeing off.

Don't forget to root against Barry Bonds. He's only two away from the Babe right now. So please put his failure in your bedtime prayers.


By the way, the first pick in 2001 for MLB was Joe Mauer to the Minnesota Twins. They passed on Mark Prior, who went second to the Cubs.